


Memories and You

by XtaticPearl



Category: The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, M/M, Memories
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-06
Updated: 2018-05-06
Packaged: 2019-05-03 00:06:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,263
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14556558
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/XtaticPearl/pseuds/XtaticPearl
Summary: There's no beginning to it, and when he tells the story to the kids later, that's what he skips out. He tells them that it began with the restaurant with the lobster meal, or the picnic day at Coney Island, but mostly the drive back home from work.That's the one he uses the most when he is asked to tell them the story they imagined with awe.





	Memories and You

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt: "I locked the keys in the car”

 

There's no beginning to it, and when he tells the story to the kids later, that's what he skips out. He tells them that it began with the restaurant with the lobster meal, or the picnic day at Coney Island, but mostly the drive back home from work.

That's the one he uses the most when he is asked to tell them the story they imagined with awe.

If he closed his eyes or simply felt around in his mind, he could remember it in clear detail, the Tuesday that his life had changed again.

 

**A Distant Summer:**

"I locked the keys in the car”

Steve completed the sentence of the article he was skimming before pulling the paper down and shooting his husband a bemused look. Tony didn’t sport a sheepish expression often but he stood at the entrance of the room wearing one, his suit impeccable and sunglasses dangling from one hand.

“Really?” Steve asked with a raised eyebrow, tone dry as the desert even as he felt fondness swell at the awkward blush on Tony’s face.

“Yeah - uh, sorry?” Tony attempted, stepping into the room and Steve leaned forward in his chair to put the paper on the coffee table, looking back up at his husband with a sigh.

“It’s funny, because I don’t remember you having a single car that doesn’t have voice recognition security,” Steve said, snorting as he got up, “Really, Tony, this is just lack of creativity now. You have better excuses than this. I’m disappointed by the lack of effort.”

Steve saw Tony’s face freeze for a second, just a flash, before he coughed and made a face. It was obvious that Tony had got caught up with some work and had missed the time alert. He had extra work to keep track of now, ever since picking up the interim Director’s job and Steve appreciated his effort to make time for everything, so he wasn’t much annoyed. Still, it was fun to tease the genius for a moment.

“I had a good dessert planned,” he confided and Tony’s eyes lit up, face clearing off the uncertainty before he stepped into Steve’s space, running a hand over his arm to cup Steve’s cheek.

“Terrible of me to delay the plans,” Tony tutted and Steve rolled his eyes with a quirked grin when the genius pulled on his most doe-eyed expression, “Forgive me? Let me make it up to you?”

“You’re incorrigible,” Steve laughed as Tony kissed his cheek.

“You’re sweet enough for both of us then,” Tony whispered and kissed him softly, melting into Steve when he was pulled closer.

He didn’t think about it till much later, probably even years later, when he had time to think. In that moment, Steve was just happy.  The sun shone bright and he was warm, not caring of an incoming monsoon.

 

**A monsoon grove :**

“I didn’t see this the last time,” Tony said, soft in the afterglow of a long-earned sleep. Steve had an arm wrapped around Tony’s waist, the white duvet pulled under their arms, watching the rain patter against the wide windows of their room. The farmhouse was surrounded by a beautiful mango grove and Steve loved the taste of mangoes in Tony’s mouth, laughter between bites. He rubbed his nose in the tangles of Tony’s hair and let the silence stay, knowing the time Tony was talking about. It had been his brief escapade to India, when they had fought each other once in bitterness; it had been sudden and Steve had been hurt at first but it had been a good decision in the end, giving them both time to find their way back to each other. It had been a respite from an unending heat of ignorance.

“It was summer back then and Rajesh -,” Tony choked on a laugh, a memory of the witty young intern he had met in that trip coming to mind, “- he wasn’t keen on playing tour guide.”

“He isn’t huge on impressing people,” Steve agreed with a smile pressed into Tony’s shoulder, feeling the warmth of the skin his lips trailed over.

“Smart kid,” Tony commented and fell silent before continuing, “I never knew rain could be so beautiful.”

Steve let that statement seep into the air between them, feeling a poignant moment settle into the dwindling light of a dawn they would witness soon. They had gone through some rough times in the past month but this moment, every moment when he got to hold Tony in his arms, it always made things worth it.

“Yeah,” he whispered against Tony's ear, smiling against its shell when Tony snuggled back into him, “It really is beautiful.”

“I should give Rajesh a call, ask him to come work with us,” Tony mused and Steve frowned, baffling confusion marring the peace.

“What?” he asked, adjusting his arms around his husband, “What'll your lead R&D scientist do in the Avengers group?”

Tony grunted and started to turn around in Steve's arms before he paused and settled.

“Tony?” Steve prompted and was about to lean over to see Tony's face when the genius chuckled softly.

“Yeah, he'll hate it,” he quipped and Steve hooked his chin over Tony's shoulder but relaxed when Tony squeezed their linked fingers. Tony had his own jokes at times that made sense later.

For now, Steve let the rain washed windows take his attention and rested with the man he loved. There was time for other things later.

 

**Winter in New York:**

“We should try it”

Tony didn't turn from his chair and Steve felt the chill of the outside still linger in his bones, even in the warmer workshop temperature. The run hadn't cleared his mind and had chilled him more than the previous night's nightmares.

“Tony,” he called out again and heard an acknowledging hum, “I mean it, we should try it. As soon as possible.”

“Had a good run?” Tony asked, leaning across the table to pick up a diary he had marked sometime during his endless research down here, “Bruce sent down some curry and bread for breakfast so there should be some for you too, if Thor hasn’t had it yet. Check it, will you?”

“I’m serious,” Steve walked towards Tony, hands fighting impulse to curl, “Will you look at me?”

“Nat wanted to discuss some SHIELD thing with you,” Tony continued, scanning the diary and throwing up its holographic projection, “I could have asked but - well, she’d remember better.”

“Look at me!” Steve placed a hand beside Tony on the table and the genius paused, a stillness in the workshop echoing, before he turned around in his seat.

“Hi,” Tony smiled, face tired but eyes kind, “You okay?”

“Okay?” Steve echoed, air rattling between his ribs as his heart fought its way out of his chest, “Ok- No, I’m not okay, Jesus, Tony.”

“Seems so,” Tony commented lightly and Steve couldn’t bear it, couldn’t stand the flippancy. His arms bunched but he raised his hands to cup Tony’s face, tilting it to meet his eyes, throat choking up at the feel of the warmth under his fingertips. Alive. There. Present.

“Please. Please do it,” Steve whispered and Tony’s face softened, the mask of cheer falling away. Steve had resisted the hold of Titans but when he felt Tony’s hand curl around his nape, he crumbled and let himself fall forward, rest his head into the crook of Tony’s neck.

“I’m sorry,” Tony said, apologetic and soothing but Steve muffled his tears of frustration and fear in Tony’s skin, “I’m sorry, Steve.”

“No, you’re not,” Steve choked out, pulling Tony closer, clutching at him with the pent up desperation of a lifetime, “You’re not.”

“I’m not,” Tony agreed and Steve hated how loving Tony could hurt, even when he knew that it was Tony who was going through pain here. “I can’t do it, Steve”

“You can try,” Steve argued, knowing that he should pull back, should look at Tony when they had this conversation, but there was only so much he could bear; moving away from Tony was not something he could do right now.

“I can, but you know it won’t work,” Tony reminded him and Steve _hated_ the certainty of it. Tony had always been a symbol, a proof of transhumanism but now, when he needed it the most, he couldn’t use it. Years and years of experimenting, or creating and destroying tech within his body, had left some things void.

“You can do anything,” Steve insisted, because he needed to believe it, he needed to hold on, “You can do the impossible, Tony, please. Please do it again.”

Tony pulled back then and Steve let him go till they could look at each other.

“Please don’t forget me,” Steve pleaded and Tony’s face crumpled for a second before he took a breath, holding Steve’s hands between his.

“You’re the one thing I can’t forget,” he promised and Steve knew that it was futile but they had lived through miracles before. Every moment he got to have Tony, the version of him that knew Steve and loved him, every frame of that was a miracle. It was a lie and a folly to stick to that but Steve couldn’t drown out his heart in ice just yet.

“I won’t let you,” he promised back and kissed Tony, the knowledge of a falling future in both their minds even as their lips silenced its truth.

 

**A forgotten fall:**

 

“And this?”

Steve let the screen slide, the holograph sparkling in blue, as the next photograph came on. A younger, fresher Tony and Steve stared back at them, both grimy in their uniforms. The Steve of 2012 had a gash on his uniform, across the star, and Tony had dents along his arm and hip. The background was of a ruined park and Steve could remember trivial details from the day. Their first mission after New York. His last before he went to DC.

“Melter,” he said, recollecting the villain who had tried to give them hell that day, “He wasn’t particularly fond of Iron Man.”

“Shocking,” Tony laughed, patting Steve’s arm around him as he rested his head back on Steve’s shoulder, “Why do you look so constipated here?”

“My natural charm,” Steve said and grinned when Tony made a face up at him, pressing an absent kiss against Tony’s hair, “I guess I wasn’t used to working with the team back then. And the paparazzi was - strange.”

“Stranger than the war-times?” Tony asked, curious as his eyes seemed droopy.

It had been strange at first, how the good days and bad days were stark in comparison. On the bad days, Tony would retreat into the workshop and Steve had learnt to be more patient, trusting Friday to be there when he wasn’t allowed. It would get easier with familiarity, he had decided even as he knew that it was never going to be easy. Death was an expected conaequence in their line of work but this - this was both alien and familiar in painful ways for Steve. He could remember Peggy flitting between herself and a muddled version of her memories, a patchwork of confusion and clarity. He had loved her then, a constant despite everything, but he hadn’t been prepared for doing it again.

Loving someone. Loving someone who loved him back. Loving someone who was slowly slipping away.

Tony’s mind had always been praised as his strength and Steve knew how much it killed him to fight something he wasn’t allowed to fix. The question of using tech to cure himself had been crushed when they had discovered the weakened nerves with the usage of BARF in the past. In a moment of clarity during one of the good days, Tony had even told Bruce that he should probably just create a new brain.

The idea had seemed good to Steve for a desperate instant before he had realized what it would cost for Tony.

There was too much to risk. To much to lose. Too much lost.

They had the world’s best doctors and medication plan in place but there was an unspoken knowledge among them all that this was one battle where they had to endure more than fight.

“Hey,” Tony called out and Steve looked down at the man in his arms, bundled in their bed. Tony reached up and brushed his fingers against Steve’s jaw. “You with me?”

Steve kissed the fingers and smiled, swallowing the lump in his throat.

“Always”

 

**The first spring:**

 

There was no real beginning, Steve remembered. It had been decades since the first time someone asked him about it - _when did it begin_? Back then, he had lied, caught onto the first instance he had noticed. The keys, he would say, the damned keys.

It hadn’t been till Antonia, Rhodey’s daughter, had asked during a quiet moment of her wedding’s after-party, that Steve had told the truth.

There had been no real beginning.

“Steve?”

Steve blinked and looked up from where he had crouched in the grass, looking at his grand-niece, eyes the colour of Tony’s blinking back at him.

“Yeah, Maria?”

“I, uh,” she looked sheepish and ran a hand over her cropped curls before shrugging, “I locked the keys in the car.”

Steve inhaled the air around him, the moment of a passing past taken in, and nodded kindly.

“I got it,” he assured and stood up, walking away with her back to the car. Behind him, the engraved reminder remained.

_Tony Stark - Always remembered._


End file.
